20 Best Self Regulation Activities for Toddlers

Learn some of the best self regulation activities for toddlers and preschoolers.

This list of self regulation strategies can help your child learn control over their emotions in effective ways that can be done at home or at school.  

Just like when a pot of boiling water filled with pasta will boil over at some point, so will our emotions when we get triggered.

This is true for adults, older kids, and especially toddlers.

Sometimes, it is difficult to keep things down. Toddlers have a harder time with a wide range of emotions that boil over constantly because they are still learning emotional self-regulation skills.

And, if I’m honest, aren’t there tons of adults out there who also need to learn better self-regulation tools?

Teaching the importance of self-regulation in early childhood is an essential life skill that will help in every day life for your little one now and for the rest of their life.

My two toddlers really struggled with big emotions, as all children do when they are younger.

These emotional reactions for things I saw as simple were always in difficult situations which threw me in emotional dysregulation!

There were some hard times and lots of big feelings, but we finally learned how to practice emotion regulation on a regular basis as part of our daily routines, and it made all the difference.

We found some pretty fun activities for self regulation too that we still use on a daily basis.

In this article, we will look at what self regulation looks like for young children, why strong emotional regulation skills are important, and a list of the most effective emotional regulation activities for kids that both toddlers and older children can enjoy!

What Is Self Regulation? 

Self-regulation is the ability of a person to consciously put their emotions, reactions, and thoughts under control when they face overwhelming or new situations that make them angry, sad, excited, scared, etc. 

It involves:

• Re-establishing a calm mood after an exciting or upsetting experience. 
• Adapting to challenging situations without losing their cool. 
• Responding to situations the right way despite the pressure of emotions. 
• Relating to people and events without letting impulses take over. 
• Thinking about an action before carrying it out. 
• Concentrating on a given task or goal and following it through to the end. 
• Doing the right thing even when they don’t feel like doing so. 
• Exercising patience when waiting their turn in a queue. 

These things are definitely not expected 100% in children, but even our little ones need to start the development of self-regulation at this young age.

The more practice they have in early childhood, the better they will be when they are adults. That’s why emotional regulation activities for toddlers is so crucial for emotional development!

It is important to note that this skill is developed from a very young age. It begins as early as the toddler stage to develop and continues well into adulthood.

No one with strong self-regulatory abilities stumbled on them. They must be learned not just by talking about them but by practicing. 

Teaching kids healthy emotional responses and self regulation is the most important life skill you can!

Why Is Self Regulation Important for Toddlers?

Just like a deficiency in a nutrient has physical effects on the body, so does a lack of self-regulation skills.

It can have adverse effects on a child’s social, emotional, and academic well-being. Having a sound self-regulation ability can help shape the child’s life in many ways.

Here are some of the benefits of teaching self regulation strategies for toddlers:

It Improves Relationship Skills

A child who learns how to stay calm and collected when faced with situations will be able to maintain relationships better.

Instead of flaring up, they remain calm and handle the situation with understanding without letting their emotions run wild.

This will reduce the rate at which they engage in arguments, quarrels, fights, or tantrums. Their social interactions will be more kind and full of empathy.

While this benefit can be seen in a parent-child relationship and with other family members and friends, it is most seen when they are older.  

If you want to teach your kids to have great social skills, it’s a good idea to start with self regulation.

Self Regulation Improves Learning Skills

This is possible because self-regulation teaches children to focus and have undivided concentration.

As a result, the child can sit still in a classroom and listen to a teacher teach. He or she can also participate in the lesson activities because the focus isn’t broken. 

Practicing these self regulation activities for 4 year olds during the preschool years can make a huge difference when they become school-age children and on their academic performance.

It Improves Independent Skills

When a child has a well-developed ability to self-regulate, it becomes possible and easy for him or her to act accordingly and make the right decisions even outside of parental guidance or adult supervision.

They can adapt quickly to new environments and difficult tasks and cope on their own to certain levels without needing you 24/7.

Self regulation helps a child’s ability to handle their strong emotions and different scenarios by themselves, which they will need to do when they become older.

Crucial for Emotional Development

Kids need to start learning about their own feelings and emotions at a young age and healthy ways to manage them.

Before a child can self regulate, they have to be able to identify their own emotions. It is the first step in the process of teaching regulation skills to toddlers.

Once younger children can identify their different emotions and the emotional state they are in, they can more effectively regulate and calm down in socially appropriate ways.

Plus, self-regulation is a sign of emotional intelligence!

Want to teach your kids how to share their emotions in a healthy way? You will love this toddler emotion book I wrote!

Helps Children to Rest

The parasympathetic nervous system is responsible for the resting state of your body.

When your child cannot self regulate, it turns on the sympathetic nervous system, or the “flight or fight” system.

No kid should be in the “flight or fight” for too long or it will harm them. That stress is not healthy for adults, let alone toddlers.

Self Regulation Teaches Problem Solving Skills

A person’s ability to recognize their negative emotions and find solutions for them is a problem solving skill you can start to teach in young kids!

Not only does it effect their mental health, but also their academic success as a child has to have problem solving skills to succeed in school and life.

How To Help Toddlers Develop Self Regulation Skills. 

Self-regulation skills begin to develop at an early stage in child development so it is important to start early.

An attitude like thumb-sucking for comfort is an example of a self-regulation skill a child adopts when feeling hungry, tired, or overwhelmed with attention.

A child without any brain development disorder had the ability to learn and develop self-regulation skills when given the right guidance and support. 

How can you help? 

1- Model what you want to see in them. If you don’t manage yourself in times of stress and anger, they’ll likely copy your ways. (check out some of the best anger management books for kids!)

2- Don’t expect perfection from the child. Neither should you expect instant results. Remember, it is a lifelong process and they are still children. 

3- Ditch punishment when they don’t live up to your expectations. These things will reduce their chances of learning and kill their spirit. 

4- Use positive reinforcements and rewards when they honestly make efforts to self-regulate. A little reward will go a long way to encourage them to keep trying. 

5- Encourage them with positive feedback as they go through the process. Talk to them about their attitude, how well they did, and where improvement is needed. Remember to focus on the efforts made and not on the results. 

6- Give them choices and teach them to make plans on their own. Exercising their ability to choose and plan their own stuff is a strong way of imbibing independence. 

7- Show them harmless ways to vent their emotions instead of suppressing them. They can stomp their feet, roar like a lion, or give themselves a hug. You can introduce a calming corner to them for their safe place.

8- Always expose them to activities or hobbies they enjoy doing. This provides a source of positive emotions when they are faced with negative situations. 

9– Teach them to change their vocabulary by changing your vocabulary. The words they hear you say are the words they will pick up. Let them know that positive remarks and confessions are powerful. 

10- Practice some fun self-regulation activities for toddlers at home they can do when their emotions try to get the better of them. 

Below, we will look at some fun activities that teach and help toddlers develop self-regulation skills.  

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20 Self Regulation Activities for Toddlers

Here are some of the top self regulation activities for preschoolers and toddlers! You can do some of these at home and at school depending on when you need them.

These are some of the best ways to help children learn how to regulate on their own in a fun way that excites them.

Simon Says

This game teaches focus and attentiveness. Make the child listen to instructions and try to do them.

Also, they try to do the opposite of the instructions as they are told. For example; raise your hand, don’t raise your hand. 

Building Blocks

Playing with blocks helps children to build focus and stability. They pay close attention to figuring out the perfect shape to add to another to make a sensible construction.

This develops choice, planning, and decision-making. 

Jenga

This is a stacking game that teaches critical thinking and planned moves. The child is careful with every move made and even when a mistake is made, the tower falling is a fun part to watch. 

Plus, it helps with emotional regulation when playing with other people. It is best for older kids as young toddlers might not be able to understand fully.

Red Light, Green Light

This is a fun way to teach attentiveness and quick thinking in kids. The adult stands and acts as the traffic light.

When the adult calls out “green light,” children must try and run to the adult. When “red light” is called out, they must freeze. If they move, they have to start over again.

First person to reach the adult becomes the traffic light.

Musical Chairs

In this game, chairs are placed in a circle with one less chair than the number of children.

The kids go for the chairs when the music playing in the background stops.

This activity can teach children to focus in unconducive environments and quick decision-making. 

It is also a great activity to help practice self regulation when they get out before winning the game.

Want to join our FREE community and have more support to help you raise your toddler to be mindful, happy, and kind? Join HERE!

Yoga

Introduce simple yoga poses or stretching exercises appropriate for toddlers. This can help them release tension and relax their bodies.

We like to do yoga every morning as part of our calm morning routine for toddlers.

Breathing Exercises

Have them take deep breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth. This helps calm the body.

There are a variety of mindful breathing techniques toddlers can try! Try out slow breathing when they are more calm and lion/dragon breathing when they are more upset.

We also like to do a mindful body scan together to help teach how breathing and our emotions affect our physical body and how to relieve the tension.

Movement Games

Things like jumping, dancing, spinning, or rolling help get extra energy out.

Shaking your entire body for as long as you can is also effective in releasing body tension, which is an important step in self regulation.

Pushing/Pulling Games

Have them push or pull objects like boxes or laundry baskets across the floor. This provides heavy work for the muscles to once again relieve the body.

Our toddlers love pushing each other in laundry baskets across the living room!

Fidget Toys

Items like bubbles, playdough, squishy stress balls, or stretchy/tactile toys can give their hands something to focus on.

We have these playdough emotion mats to further help learn about regulating difficult emotions in a fun way.

Fidget toys are some of the best calming toys for toddlers too!

Fine Motor Activities

Play with tongs, tweezers, eyedroppers and transfer small objects. Opening and closing containers builds finger dexterity and the development of fine motor skills.

It takes a lot of focus for toddlers to use tweezers, and they have to navigate when things don’t work out how they wanted it to, further helping with self regulation.

Reading Books

Offer cozy spaces for toddlers to relax with some books independently.

Encourage toddlers to spend quiet time looking at books or being read to. This can help them relax and focus their attention.

We like to have what I call “library time” at home where I get to read my books quietly and so do they. It’s been so helpful!

Check out some of our favorite books for toddlers.

Use Timers

Use a timer or count down for transitions. The auditory cue helps prepare them for switching activities.

The use of timers is so crucial for daily routines and small toddlers. It is one of the simplest self regulation strategies for young kids!

Deep Pressure

Provide opportunities for bear hugs, squeezes between couch cushions or pillows, or warm/heavy blankets.

Deep pressure activities are so important for emotional regulation! Even having a stuffed animal for kids to hold and cuddle is beneficial.

Nature Walks

Being outside helps change the environment and get fresh air. Observe birds, clouds, leaves, etc.

Take toddlers for short walks in nature, allowing them to explore and connect with the outdoors. This can help them regulate their emotions by providing a calming environment.

Try a nature scavenger hunt to see everything they can spot!

Calming Music

Play soft, soothing music to create a relaxed mood and bring down their crazy energy levels.

Encourage toddlers to dance or move to music. This can help them release energy and express their emotions in a positive way.

Dancing to calming music is one of the best self-regulation activities for 1 year olds that you can do together.

Learn with Sesame Street App

If you allow “tablet time” in your home, and want an educational app for your toddler, the Learn with Sesame Street app is a social-emotional app that we use and LOVE!

Calm Down Corner

Having a calm down corner is a great way to teach emotional self regulation in kids.

In your calm down corner, have the following, if you can:

• playdough with emotions playdough mats
• breathing and tracing cards
• emotion posters
• mindfulness books
• affirmation cards

This toddler emotion book I wrote made all the difference in helping my toddlers learn to identify and talk about their emotions.

Sensory Bottles and Bins

Sensory bins and bottles are a great addition to having in a calm down corner and work great for practicing self regulation.

There are tons of sensory bin ideas and even some great calming sensory bottles your toddlers will love.

We always have a sensory bin up for our kids and it’s so awesome to see them go and play when they feel the need.

Identify Emotions Activities

There are a few different games and activities to help your toddlers learn their emotions that I have came up with that we love to play.

Emotions Wheel: Either hang up on the wall and point to what you are feeling, or put a spinner on it and whatever emotion your child lands on, they have to act out.

Emotions Matching Game is also super easy and fun and will help them identify all types of feelings.

What Am I Feeling Worksheets: Comes with flashcards, a poster, and worksheets to help teach kids how to express their emotions.

Toddler Self Regulation Activities Wrap-Up

These are some of the best self-regulation activities for 2 year olds and preschoolers that we love to do with our toddlers.

The key is providing a range of options they can choose from based on their needs in the moment.

As you practice and use these activities for self regulation in your daily routines, your kids will be better able to handle any emotion and situation that comes there way!